Gameweek 5 Hall of Shame: the blanks, the cameos, and the captain who cost you
The awards nobody wants from Gameweek 5, starting with B.Fernandes. Every one of them a real number, which is the problem.
The awards nobody wants
Gameweek 5 is in the books, the damage is priced in, and it is now safe to laugh about it.
Every award below is a real lookup against the round's data. Nothing here is invented, which is the part that stings.
The Golden Blank
B.Fernandes, £12.0m, 90 minutes, 2 points. He was owned by 38.9% of the game going in, so at least the disappointment was catered.
The Armband Tax
The field captained Haaland and, for once, the field was right: 6 became 12. Enjoy it. This award is not usually a compliment.
The One You Did Not Own
Dasilva (£4.0m) scored 15 while owned by 0.7% of managers. The other 99.3% are currently explaining to themselves that they would never have started him, which is true, and beside the point.
Cameo of the Week
Carvalho was on the pitch for 3 minutes and came off it with 6 points. Efficiency of that order should be studied, or at least owned.
Best Value on the Board
Dasilva at £4.0m returned 15 — 3.8 points per million. Premium ownership is a lifestyle choice and this is the invoice.
Mugged by the Woodwork
0.97 xGI, zero returns: Gonzalo did everything but the last bit. Historically the last bit arrives. Historically it arrives the week after you sell him.
For the record
The average manager scored 48, the best score in the game was 126, and the gap between them was 78 points — roughly a captain, a bench and a small amount of luck.